Friday, September 21, 2012

Finding THE DRESS!!! Advice and my experience!

This is my wedding dress experience. I am not super knowledgeable in wedding fashion, and I don't think that I am either! This is just MY ADVICE based on MY EXPERIENCE. Enjoy!
Some photos from www.alfredangelo.com
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A couple of years ago I came to the realization that I am in "THAT" age range...the one where it seems like EVERYONE you know is getting engaged. You can't get on Facebook without seeing another ten posts of beautiful diamond rings with the caption "I SAID YES!" And when it was finally my turn, I did the same exciting thing! After the proposal (which I may or may not share the story..it was very private and sweet, and I may decide to keep it that way), I took the next exciting step: finding my wedding dress!
I poured through magazines, dog-earing pages that had dresses that met all of my requirements (or what I THOUGHT they were at the time), I spent hours on websites adding dresses to my "favorites," and overlooked a ton of dresses because they didn't meet the "things" on my must have list. Here was the list:
  • MUST be A-Line. I am not a princess, nor do I want to look like a cupcake. Just enough gradual flare is all I want.
  • MUST be mostly lace. I just love the look of lace.
  • MUST be "relatively modest," as I do not wish for catty people to gossip about a low neckline or  too much of my back showing. Also...the main reason...the purpose of a wedding is to vow to love the other person for eternity..not to show skin and draw attention to the wrong things.
  • MUST not have any ruffles, feathers, cut-outs, bows, or puffs of fabric. I don't want to look ridiculous
  • MUST BE IVORY!
Looking back, my rules were stupid. And I broke 50% of them!

I visited three stores total, and I stopped at three because I found THE dress, and the FIRST bit of advice I can give is this:
WHEN YOU FIND THE DREAM DRESS, STOP LOOKING! Nothing will compare to it, and it will start to lose the special feeling of looking for your dress.

Moving on: I found one dress at the first store, a local privately owned bridal shop. The dress was a lace A-Line with a modest train and boring neckline. But it fit all the "rules," and it was only $400 dollars. It was beautiful! But it just didn't "feel right."



Next was Alfred Angelo. I spent hours on the website. I had a list of all the styles I wanted them to pull. And I went in KNOWING which dress I wanted. It was at this store where I realized that I was boring. I pulled at least ten dresses. Some were disasters, like my "dream dress." 

Being in between sample sizes, none of the dresses really fit right., but I could still get an idea of what I liked. The reason I wanted to go to Alfred Angelo was because of the Disney collection!!! Who doesn't want to be a Disney princess, right? I tried on four from this collection: Belle, Snow White, Sleeping Beauty, and......Cinderella. They were all beautiful. Stunning. Unique. True to the Princess. But none was like Cinderella. 
Cinderella is a TRUE ball gown. It was not lace, and it was not ivory. It was not simple, it was not A-Line, and it was COVERED in glitter. The train was several feet long, and the beading was exquisite. My mom cried when I put it on and said that it was "me." I agreed....and yet it broke all of my rules! This was it. This was the dress. Even though it wasn't entirely fitting to the small (VERY SMALL and simple) wedding I wanted, it was stunning. I felt like a princess! 

I was ready to quit looking, but there was one more dress hanging in the dressing room. It hung there alone on the back of the tiny room, and I debated not putting it on at all. It had asymmetrical ruffles cascading down, and after my lovely experience with a ball gown, I decided this dress didn't have enough flare. But....the top of it was this beautiful ivory lace with very pretty beading. The color of the lace is what caught my eye when it was hanging in the store. To be honest, that was the only reason I pulled it. I was sick of trying on dresses at that point, but I groaned and put it on. It took forever to be laced into it, and lacing was a new experience for Mom and me. Finally I walked out onto the floor, stepped up on the platform and looked in the mirror. I didn't say anything at that moment, but I was sold. Cinderella was beautiful. But this dress was something unique and creative, and it flattered my figure in a very classy way that no other dress could. It was a little big, but it could be ordered in my size. I didn't remember seeing it on the website. I overlooked it because it broke the ruffle rule. But the odd symmetry and ruffles were the details that made it so lovable. It looks entirely different on me and the model. It just goes to show that YOU CANNOT JUDGE A DRESS BY A PICTURE!! YOUR BODY JUDGES A DRESS IN A WAY YOUR EYES ARE UNABLE TO!

My dress (style 2123) on the model. They have it positioned weird. The shadows downplay the ruffles. Sorry, but the skinny model just doesn't fill it out! I overlooked it on the website. But on me....it was my dream dress.

This was the sample dress. It was a little big, but I just knew. I visited David's Bridal, and found a dress there too, but it didn't compare. I went back to Alfred Angelo the following week and ordered this exact dress, but smaller. I lost about 15 pounds before my wedding, and my dress fit me like a glove. The deciding factor was that I KNEW Paul would love it. I don't know how, but I just knew. That thought brought tears to my eyes. Another factor: my Daddy loved it too. : )Mom cried, and Dad sat quietly and smiled and nodded. 



This post has been insanely long. It is time to end! To sum it all up, here is my wedding dress advice:
  1. Do NOT be afraid to break your rules.
  2. Learn what flatters your figure, and go from there. I am an hourglass figure, so ball gowns, A-Lines, and some Mermaids do well on me. 
  3. Pick maybe ONE or TWO items from your must have list, and choose different dresses which also feature different details. Don't pull 17 A-Line lace dresses in Ivory. Start with the style...then maybe go with the color...then pull different things. You never know what you like until you try it on!
  4. Do NOT NOT NOT write off a dress until you have put it on. If I had done this, I never would have found my dress: the lonely dress with ruffles hanging in the dressing room, the last to be looked at.
  5. Stick to your budget. I didn't mention this above, but Mom and I set a budget and I didn't even try on something that was above budget unless it was on sale, or verrrryyyy close.
  6. Speaking of money: the great thing about local stores is that the owners OWN the dresses and therefore can set the prices. They are often the lowest you will find. Go in little bridal shops too! I just happened to find mine at a large chain store!
  7. Chain stores: Almost always have sales! For example, the weekend we bought my dress, Alfred Angelo was having a sale. For however much you spent, you got a certain discount. I believe my discount was somewhere between 50 and 100 dollars. Also...if you buy from chain stores, ask about accessories! My veil was discounted, as was my slip, and if I had decided to have bridesmaids, their dresses would have been discounted!
  8. If a dress doesn't have the "perfect" shape, ask about different undergarments. My dress wasn't "poofy" enough (after Cinderella entranced me) and the sales associate had a simple fix: a trumpet slip! It was slimming, AND it offered me the "poof" I wanted!
  9. AGAIN: When you find THE DRESS: Stop looking!
  10. Take pictures in magazines into consideration, but don't plan based on them. Your body chooses a dress. It is that simple.
I could keep going with the advice, but I am gonna stop here. I hope you all enjoyed this post! (If you had the patience to make it to the bottom!!) 
Thanks for reading!

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